HOW TO FIND A GOOD MAN IN 2013

The first day of 2013 was probably one of my favorite days of the New Year thus far.  I had the opportunity to serve with an amazing group of men and women who had a heart to share love, encouragement, and resources with individuals that were facing some challenging moments.  By the end of the night, we all were pleased about the impact we were able to make in the lives of these men and women at the transition home.  We decided to get some dinner and ended up going to Roscoe's Chicken and Waffles in Hollywood, California (If you never have been here, you should definitely go).

While at Roscoe's, we talked about several different things.  The topic of conversation that stood out to me was the discussion about women having a hard time meeting a good man.  In essence, they felt it was much more difficult for a woman to find a good man than the other way around.  They went so far as to say that they felt that there was a shortage of good men in Southern California and how some of their friends believe that they may be single for the rest of their lives.  Based on the ratio of men to women in Southern California, I can understand their point to a certain extent, but as a motivational speaker, I had to bring them hope by reminding them that there are lots of good men in Southern California.  I know lots of men who would serve as good relationship partners for these women.

This conversation stuck with me and I have thought more deeply about it because I have heard many women share the same experience.  Instead providing hope to women who secretly or outwardly share these same concerns, I decided to develop five simple strategies that I believe can help women meet a good man in 2013.  I believe these simple strategies can help women find a good man in 2013 and help create a healthy relationship which is built to last.

Relationship Tip #1

Know What a Good Man Is

Unfortunately, I have met women who believe a man cannot be considered a good man unless they make $200,000 per year or look like a cover model.  Although these are great qualities to possess, a man can lack the above qualities and still be a good man.  Here are some other qualities to look for: ambition in life, consistent career that does not equate to $200,000 per year, character and integrity, confidence and courage, believes in family, hard-worker, respectable, supportive, loving towards women, and most importantly, is someone that you can trust to be there for you.

Relationship Tip #2

Develop the Inner Qualities that "ALL" Good Men "DESIRE"

Relationship experts will tell you that most men desire a woman who is attractive and loves to have sex.  This is a true statement and probably will never change!  But, in addition to these two highly popular qualities, the other "key" qualities that will enable a woman to keep or get recognized by a good man is

her character, integrity, authenticity, ability to be trusted, support and admiration for the man, kindness, love, and God-given skills.

Relationship Tip #3

Don't Allow Your PAST to AFFECT Your FUTURE

I believe that most women have the opportunity to meet a good man at some point each year, but many of these opportunities never flourish because one or both parties allow their baggage

, negative attitudes, and bad experiences affect the new man or woman attempting to enter their life.

In essence, instead of giving everyone a fair shot, many "HURT PEOPLE" allow their past hurts, frustrations, and experiences taint the new relationships that are being presented to them on a daily basis.   Sadly, the end result is a missed opportunity!

Relationship Tip #4

Go to the Places where GOOD MEN Hang Out

Although I believe a woman can meet a good man anywhere, it is also important that good women seek out places she believes that good men are most likely to hang out.  These locations can vary, but I have found through my own experiences that many of the good men I have crossed paths with attend sporting events, work-out at the gym, attend family/friend gatherings, attend networking/professional/job-related events, attend church, holiday parties, attend volunteering activities, and educational events that are geared towards helping them become better in life.

Now, you do not have to go to these places looking to find a good man.  If you are in the vicinity of the good men, he will see you and approach you!

Relationship Tip #5

Believe and Be OPEN to DAILY Opportunities

I know that it can be challenging to meet the right person; I challenge you to continue to believe and be open to the possibility every day.  I believe that the right person will cross your path at some point.  This perspective is not just optimistic thinking but something I have seen transpire in many women's lives who were struggling to find a good man.  And, guess what, if it happened to them, it can surely happen for you!

Obviously, there are many more tips for men and women, but these are five simple strategies I wanted to share with women after my conversation on New Year's Day.